I have a girl crush on Fergie. The post-blonde Fergie, that is.
The *brunette* Fergie.
Fergie wasn’t even a blip on my girl crush radar when she was blonde (except when I’d see a picture of her in US Weekly, on the arm of her tall drink of man water, Josh Duhamel).
Before I continue, let us take a Josh Duhamel moment. Ahhhhhhhh.
So I suppose I haven’t payed much attention to the blonde Fergie because if I’m going to kiss a girl, I’d prefer she be a brunette one.
The “new” and if I may, “improved” Fergie caught my eye on the A.I. finale. As she was dancing and singing with The Black Eyed Peas to “Boom Boom Pow”, I began to see her in a new way. What was it? Why was I so drawn to her performance? I mean, the song was catchy, but I was NOT looking at will.i.am!
Then it hit me.
It was the hair. She was brunette-a-licious! (Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
I immediately texted Matt who texted back, “Who?” (Guess he’s into blondes :) )
Then I had a radical thought.
Maybe I’d switch teams and dye my hair brown too!
And it wouldn’t be the first time…
Ok, so I’m going to lose a little bit of my blonde cred with all my blondie homies out there, but it’s time to admit that I did cross over–once.
I dyed my hair brown. And I liked it.
I felt sexier. Edgier. Good different.
Back then, I was pretty daring with my ‘dos. I had stripes, (yes, stripes–AT Liz’s wedding) I had The Rachel, (which unfortunately looked a lot more like The Carol Brady) and The Gwyneth. But my personal favorite was The Rocky. I bleached my hair white, cut it as short as Brigitte Nielsen in Rocky IV and spent all my time with a friend with even shorter hair. Needless to say, most people thought we were a really cute lesbian couple! (Note to self: probably not a good way to meet men! Or women who look like Fergie!)
So, after I “went brown”, I felt like “the evil twin”, “the bad girl” and “the mysterious stranger” all wrapped up into one! There was something about the new color that made me feel daring- and gave me ‘tude. I went out to clubs! I wore red lipstick! I even bought black leather pants! (Even when I had stripes in my hair, my wildest outfit was mom jeans and a half-top. So this was big for me!)
And now, more years than I want to admit later…after playing it safe with my long, blonde hair, (with the exception of a few daring moments when I “cut layers”-ooooh!)… I thought I was ready to take another walk on the dark side.
And it was time to tell someone my plan!
In hindsight, I guess it shouldn’t have been one of my blonde friends. And this particular blondie *who shall remain nameless * (but you know who you are!!! ), gasped in horror at my idea! (Talk about a buzz kill…)
BLONDE NAMELESS FRIEND: No way! You’re a blonde and you will remain true to your *cough* roots!
ME: But…lots of blondes do it. Jessica Simpson. Cameron Diaz. Nicole Richie…
BLONDE NAMELESS FRIEND: And are any of them still brunette?
ME: Point taken. Ugh.
My dreams of channeling my inner Fergie deflated, I went home and looked in the mirror. Going brown would be fun for a couple of weeks, but the process of getting back to blonde would f***ing suck. I wasn’t going to look as good in black (the only color I own!) and would I really have as much fun? (I’m over 35 now, I can’t afford to take chances!)
So in the end, I decided NOT to dye (Special shout out to nameless blonde friend– I hope you’re f***ing happy!)
Because at the end of the day, you can take the blonde out of the girl, but you can’t take the girl out of the blonde.
xoxo
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Lisa, I remember your brown stage quite clearly for some reason…and you were a little “different”! I don’t know if it was the guys you were dating around that time or that red suede dress you wore to your birthday party that year, but it was a new you!
I often want to switch teams, and considering the fact that I’m not even a natural blonde, it should be an easy choice. But the sad fact is that I now play part-time for another team, TEAM GREY. And my blonde-ness covers it up just a little bit better when I wait an extra week to get my hair done. So team blonde it is!
xoxo
Lisa,
I went team brunette about a year ago, because keeping up with the blonde was hard with a baby, and if I could post a picture of brunette me you would be able to see that I rocked it! After a time however, I began to miss the blonde me, with blonde hair I didn’t need as much make up with brown I had to cake it on. Blonde me had more clothing options, brunette me couldn’t pull off the cute yellow top. Brunette me looked older! Brunette me looked like my mom! Ahhhhhh!I slowly made the transition back to blonde over 6 months and I’m a happier to report I look 5 years younger as a result.
Correction: The suede dress was HOT PINK (WTH?) And If memory serves, I had two giant blonde stripes framing my face. I think I was also a bit chunky (I was going through a bad carbs phase). It was NOT a good look for me…..even though I THOUGHT I was kind of hot?!
Team Grey! Ha. Well, you can’t tell! Grace does a good job. And on that note, your hair didn’t seem darker to me when I saw you this weekend?
PS: In case any one is wondering, I actually am a natural blonde! I just need that in writing.
Carrie–older, like your mother, ahhhh. So not what I had in mind when I thought of switching to brunette. I’m happy you went back! Once you’ve gone blonde, you can never really go back.
I think I would have to spend time in the locker rooms with members of both teams before I made up my mind:-).
Did your brown hair make it look red? Cuz it was RED, girlfriend. xoxo
It was totally hot pink, but whatevuh. Your grey hair must be getting to your brain.
Peter, I have no doubt that’s how most men would like to make up their minds!
lisa, i hope i am not the lesbian friend to which you are referring? :) ha, ha! short hair rocks! and what a barrette collection we had back then! mine is….still short.
Shannon–um, yeah, that’s you! It’s not like I hung out with a posse of women with boyishly short hair! :)
But, for the record, we rocked our short ‘dos! I still firmly believe that!!! (As Robert, my hairstylist, is my witness!)
Lisa– maybe I should try a blonde straight long weave? Hmmm…Probably not… I’ll undoubtedly look like a drag queen or Lil Kim (the draq queen’s Queen). I’m a brunette for life– guess that explains why I rocked those black leather jeans while hitting the NYC clubs back in ’99.
Astra… Please don’t! You’ll look like a cast off from Flavor of Love!!
I love your brunette weave! Don’t change a thing.
And PS: you wore leather pants LAST week and you totally rocked them! 1999 my ass!
I agree with Lisa….once you go blonde, ya can’t go back. I am currently on my way back to blonde from a brunette/goth phase. It was great for a while, edgy and dangerous. Then I just looked old. And pale. So, highlights and spray tan, here I come!!
Seana–I looked really pale too! And after looking at the pictures, I now realize I looked older?! But why do so many natural brunettes look so good? That’s what I want to know! I’m jealous (I guess this is an example of wanting what you can’t have?)