As you most of you know, Lisa and I have been, well, inseparable since we met our freshman year of high school. (What can I say? I knew anyone that could pull off red eyeglasses and an LA Gear jean jacket would make a good partner in crime!) And with few exceptions, we’ve stuck by each others side for the past, *gulp* TWENTY THREE YEARS.
And since that fateful day in 1989, we’ve been like peanut butter and jelly. Milk and cookies. Or Grey Goose and olive juice!
So we totally get it when people are a little freaked out by the parallel lives we’ve been leading since then. It’s even baffled us at some point or another. Maybe because:
- We went to college together and lived in same house for years without killing each other! (but just barely, there was an incident involving hand-bending and The Fugitive movie…)
- We joined the same sorority. (how else could we have scored our fake IDs?)
- We had the same major AND took all our classes together even after most teachers started calling us BOTH Lisa! (cue my junior year identity crisis…)
- We have parents that STILL live a mile from each other in San Diego.(My mom is her dad’s real estate agent! Does it get any more incestuous than that?)
- AND, back in the day, we *coincidentally* both dumped our good-for-nothing boyfriends the same week. (Because, of course, we both used to love dating jackasses!)
But that all ended last July when Lisa left me to be with her super fabulous fiance. And although we didn’t actually SEE each other very much when we lived five miles apart(Lisa was always working and Liz was drowning in dirty diapers), it was nice to know that happy hour with her was just a phone call away. (Or an email-in those days her blackberry was permanently glued to her hand.) Now even trying to talk shit about The Real Housewives of New Jersey requires a major calendar synchronization!
So it’s been a tough transition for us. Because not only are we friends, but we’re co-authors and business partners too. And with Lisa waking up a two hours earlier than me each morning, that leaves a whole lot of emails that I’m opening sans caffienation.
Got an early morning workout in Chicago? I really want to hear about your new yoga class, I really do. But you do realize it’s f*cking 4am here, right?
Just can’t wait to Facebook about who gets the final rose each Monday night? Hey beyotch! It’s bad enough that PSTers can’t even log on to Twitter for fear of spoilers. Now you’re doing it too? Is this because we enjoy sun all year round?
So yes, communicating properly has become a whole lot harder since Lisa headed down Route 66 on her way to her new life. But the bright spot? We actually talk live a lot more then we used to when she lived here. And absence really does make the heart grow fonder-I think I may have actually written “Love you!” on a text the other day (a gesture which very clearly breaks our robot friendship bylaws).
But like any great friendship, we’ll make our differences(time differences, that is…) work until we can get in the same time zone once again. And the moral to this story? Call up your BFF and ask her to meet you for a glass of wine this week. you never know where life will lead you-take time to enjoy your friendship today!
Add a Comment
I smell a sit-com! Actually, you two sound a lot like the female version of my college buddies and I, except you’re both better looking than my dudes, and seemingly a tad more mature. I really appreciate your voice. Keen observations and cutting wit. Good stuff.
Thanks Colin! Although I’m not sure about the mature part…=)
I love this and it couldn’t have come at a more perfect time – I just left Chicago and moved to Scottsdale so my BFF is in a timezone two hours later than me. I sent her an email that buzzed on her iPhone the other night at 3 a.m. She sent me a text that beeped my phone at 4 a.m. the other morning. We are SOOo not in sync! And it’s so true about keeping connected via the phone now, and also we find we are saying I LOVE YOU so much more! Thanks for this awesome reminder for keeping close to the ones who mean the most! I think you both are great and hope to meet you two some day! Steph
I can totally relate! My two bestfriends (I have known one for 22 years, since 5th grade, and the other since our freshman year of high school) live on the East coast while I am in Phoenix, AZ. But I talk to them more now (through text, e-mail, and Facebook) then I probably would if we stilled lived in the same state!
Well said! What a great reminder to appreciate our BFFs when we have them in the same space :)… me? I’m jetting off to NYC in two weeks for a Girls Only fest with my very own BFF that lives there now. Carpe diem, ladies!
That’s sweet. It reminds me of my friendship with my BFF. We’re only one time zone away, but we haven’t seen each other in a year. We have a psychic connection though. :)
Stephanie- So funny that you both buzzed each other “after hours”… I guess my excuse that MOST PEOPLE have their cell phones on silent will no longer work! Moving away definitely increases the emotional level of a friendship whether you like it or not! :)
Stephanie S.- I would say that Liz and I talk so much more than we did when we lived ten miles apart. In the same time zone and practically the same zip code. There’s something about moving that really does bring the friendship to a whole new level. I think you appreciate each other more.
Heidi- NY? Girls fest? LOVE IT! That’s the way to do it!
Your post made me cry. 39 years ago I met my BFF on the first day of my freshman year of high school. We did everything together, got married within a week of each other, had babies at the same time (when we were barely 20), took vacations together, loved, laughed and grew up together. I lost her 13 years ago to cervical cancer. So when you think about calling your BFF for a glass of wine, dinner or just going out for coffee, don’t second guess yourself, you NEVER know when you might get to do so again, if ever. I will never forget the last time I had coffee with Rita and I cherish the memory with all my heart.
Here is to best friends!
Ciao Bellas,
Ardee-ann
Ardee- ann- Wow. Your story is incredibly touching. Thank you so much for sharing it and for sharing in the celebration of friendship!
Liz- I must say that being in the same time zone during this trip out to California has been nice! It really makes me miss how easy we had things before. How I never had to glance at the clock to make sure it was “okay to call or text” you. How I would never be a spoiler alert of your beloved Bachelorette. But I do agree that it brought us closer and definitely makes me appreciate our friendship even more. I honestly think I see you more NOW than I did when we lived just a few miles apart. So funny! Thank you for writing such a nice post about “us”… You realize we’ve been friends for almost a quarter of a freakin’ century!?!? Much LOVE, Lisa :)
Steph, It gets better, I promise! And I would love to meet one day!!! I think you and I are both in the same time zone so we have that working for us! xoxo
Melissa, I fee the same way about Lisa! I can just look at her and tell what’s she’s thinking. =)
Ardee-Ann, thanks so much for sharing your beautiful story with us. =)
Lisa, you have no idea how excited I am to watch the Bachelorette with you tonight!!! It’s the little things.
I totally get the “Time Zone Trauma”. Both my dad and brother are in your time zone. Sounds like Lisa and I share the same time zone. It is sometimes difficult to communicate. Someone is always asleep. I have no doubt you will find a good system. You both cherish they friendship so it will work out. We all should be so lucky to have the friendship you both have.
Lynette, Thank you so much! You’re right, I feel really lucky to have such a special friendship. xoxo
Very sweet! You two remind me of my twin sister and myself. How LUCKY you are to have found such a friendship and sisterhood in each other! Always enjoy reading your articles and blogs!
Hi Girls! I found you via Allison Winn Scotch’s blog. I can’t wait to dive into your blog and have a look.
Your friendship story is so endearing and quite lovely. And I love the robot friendship bylaws! My sister who is my best friend and I are the same way.
And just so you know, guys can have the same kind of closeness—in a friend, dude—totally just a friend. My husband and his business partner have been partners now for 20 years. They met right out of college and just hit it off. They’ve built a business from the ground up and throughout those years have remained best friends.
When my husband and I bought our first house, our third wheel, his business partner, bought the house next door. When the business partner met a girl, fell in love and got married, his wife became one of my dearest friends. How could she not? We lived next door to each other! When we moved to a new town, they found a house 10 doors down from us. When we found some property to build on, we thought the amount of acreage was just too costly and big for us, so naturally we thought of them. We’ve spent our lives as families, holding hands across the universe.
And here’s the best part: Our kids have known each other since the day they were born, 3 for 3. And they are all the best of friends.
People find it hard to believe when we tell our story, but it’s true. On those emergency contact numbers for school, when I list them, it’s too hard to define our relationship so I just write what I know to be the truth—family. We’re a family.
Sorry to be such a hijacker my first day here on your blog, but I loved your story and wanted to share mine.
Thanks so much Jill!!! xoxo
Joann, Welcome!!! We’re so glad you found us! My hubby has had his friends for over twenty years too. And I totally agree, when you have had friends for that long, they just sort of become family! Thanks so much for the wonderful comment! xoxo